4 Healthy breakup songs from mainstream artists
Mean breakup songs are out, thoughtful break-up songs are in now.
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During this pandemic, lockdowns and isolation lead to a lot of reflection for many of us, focusing on what really matters in life, what side we want to improve or what could we do that we didn’t dare to do before, and so on.
So, at this point, does it really matter to be mean to our exes? Absolutely not. They’re not in our lives anymore, and holding grudges won’t lead anywhere. If you like mainstream music and your post-pandemic resolution is to let these negative feelings go, these four songs are perfect for you!
“Happiness” — Taylor Swift
Of course, I had to mention Taylor Swift, one of the most talented mainstream songwriters. “Happiness”, the 7th track of her 2020 album Evermore, is probably one of her most mature break-up songs to this day.
In the song, Swift tells the story of a woman who is divorcing her husband, ending a 7-years long relationship. She is suffering and tempted to be mean to him, but she is self-aware enough to understand that she is too angry to pretend to see things objectively, and villainizing him is not fair.
The chorus sums up the moral of this story: most of the time, a (supposedly healthy) relationship is made of happy moments. But, the moment we break up with our partners, we forget that and focus only on the sorrowful present we’re living in.
“I haven’t met the new me yet”, which refers to Abigail’s struggle to move on, is probably one of the most thought-provoking lines from this song. If you have been single for several years, like me, there might be moments where you ask yourself: “Am I over my ex?”, “Why am I still single?”, “Am I happy single?”. Well, when you doubt, think about this line and know that it’s okay if you haven’t met your new you yet.
“Thank u, next” — Ariana Grande
Next, we have the first single from the album Thank u, next by Ariana Grande. The beat itself is already incredibly calming and comforting, at least to me, and the lyrics are just as wholesome.
In the song, Grande mentions her most famous exes and tells them “thank you” for the life lessons they gave her, which helped make her the woman she is today.
Despite all the positives of those relationships, Ariana Grande still mentioned that one of them taught her pain, meaning that there were some issues. This small reference brings some realness to the song, preventing it from crossing the line between gratefulness and toxic positivity. The title itself is also a sign that she wants and feels ready to move on.
Indeed, the last part deals with her marriage, where her future self ends up marrying none other than… herself, “Ari”! It ends with a hopeful message for all those who are hurt: you can move on and you will be happy, with or without a partner.
“New Rules” — Dua Lipa
Compared to the previous songs, the 2017 single “New Rules” by Dua Lipa has a more practical and less positive storyline. The protagonist is dating a guy, but she is well aware that this relationship isn’t working and decides to create some rules to protect herself and move on.
While listening, we can clearly grasp that she probably has already broken up with this man, but he still lingers around, calls her while drunk and asks her to be friends, which always ends up with the two having sex.
Therefore, she makes a drastic decision, as we mentioned before: creating three rules to set her boundaries more firmly. The decisiveness and confidence of the protagonist of this storyline makes the lyrics stand out from other mainstream songs.
This song is for everyone who is dealing with an unstable relationship that is making them suffer, because it provides literal advice and helps you stop idealizing your former relationships and set boundaries. I personally consider this a healthy break-up song because it does not bash the ex too much, but it is still packed with realness.
“Someone like you” — Adele
This song is probably one of the most famous singles by British singer Adele. The protagonist talks about her feelings during her ex’s wedding and wishes him the best, persuaded that she will find another partner just as good as him.
Besides being the perfect song to cry over a break-up, its lyrics are not hateful or grudgy, but rather melancholic because of a happy moment that endend.
However, Adele is also confident that she is going to find love again with a person just like her ex. This means that the man she mentions is great, but is not the only great man in the world, which is a perspective balanced between optimism and realism about the past moments and Adele’s current state.
This song is for everyone who needs a good cry (duh!), but also for everyone who thinks they will never move on from this break-up. Remember that yes, you had a lot of happy and unforgettable moments with your partner, but you have also been able to live happy moments without them and you will live even more, so don’t lose hope!
Music can help you cope in a healthy way
These are just a couple of examples of how music can be a healthy coping mechanism that can prompt self-reflection. While a lot of break-up songs are often mean to the ex involved, these four convey a more balanced and practical take.
Do you like these songs? Do you know any other healthy breakup songs?
